I sat with my anger long enough to realize it was grief
I sat soaked in my tears to realize it was fear & anxiety
I sat with my heart racing to realize my mind & soul were trapped in another time
I sat blank realizing I so wanted the silence but was afraid where it would lead
I sat with a bottle only to realize it made everything worse
I sat with my stonedness only to realize it trapped me from truly sitting with & moving through all my emotions
I sat with my shopping, click happy fingers, only to realize I was buying stuff to fill a void inside
I sat with DCIS in the hospital to realize it was my time to rise up…yet I fell so fucking hard that rising up is still going on years later
I sat without my breasts only to realize I never fully appreciated those beautifully formed& fully functioning appendages until they were cut from me
I sat with my new body only to fully realize this was the only one I was ever going to get
I sat with myself through it all
I sat through my laughter to realize how happy this present moment is
I sat with my smile to realize how much love & joy was around me right now
I sat with my stillness long enough to realize the only thing scarier than not sitting in it all is to cope with it all with external distractions
I sat with my son long enough to realize how much of our early childhood years are imprinted so deep in our being
I sat with my dying grandmother not nearly long enough but enough to realize the true meaning of generational wealth has nothing to do with money
I sat with dad as he entered hospice only to realize he realized so much too late
I sat with my sobriety to realize it was empowering
I sat with my body stretching & recovering from weight training to realize I was strong as fuck if I wanted to be
I sat with my energy long enough to realize it was mine and mine alone to alter
I sat with my intentions long enough to realize I was the only one in my way no matter how easy it was to point the finger somewhere else
I sat with my daughter long enough to realize she was truly manifested by love & represented so much about overcoming
I sat with my stillness long enough to trust it; to trust myself
I sit now with a purpose so highly charged it’s eager to get back out there & pick up where I started in the mental health field & holistic wellness field
I sit now with my inner knowing in alignment & I rise above
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